The cry of my heart

Today, I am moved to first of all share the words of a Don Moen song that many of us know and sing. I ask that you think through these words afresh.

With every beat of my heart, every song that I sing
Every prayer that I pray, every offering I bring
In every thought that I have, every word that I say
Oh, be glorified
From the start of each day, till the end of the night
Let me bring praise, let me bring light
Lord I offer my life, as a sacrifice
Be glorified

Refrain:
This is my prayer
It’s the cry of my heart,
Lord I want my life to reflect Who You are
Oh Lord, please stir up the fire
And burn everything, till all I desire is You


With every breath that I take, and everything that I do
Let me lift up Your name and bring honour to You
Let the words of my mouth only speak truth
Oh, be glorified  

Refrain:
This is my prayer
It’s the cry of my heart,
Lord I want my life to reflect Who You are
Oh Lord, please stir up the fire
And burn everything, till all I desire is You

Oh yes, this is my prayer
It’s the cry of my heart,
Lord I want my life to reflect Who You are
Oh Lord, oh Lord, Oh Lord.....please stir up the fire
And burn everything, till all I desire is You

And in everything I say, in everything I do
Oh Lord..............Be glorified
In every situation, in every conversation
Oh God.......Be glorified
This is my prayer....
The cry of my heart....
Oh Lord.....I want my life to reflect Who You are

Be glorified

I don’t know why but in the last couple of weeks, the words to this song have taken on a newer and deeper meaning to me. The words simply resonate in my spirit and this song has been playing in my head, or as a constant refrain on my lips especially in the last few days. I believe God is speaking something to me, and inadvertently to you too sis.

I will confess that my mind has been sort of a blank on what I would write about in this next post.....writer’s block it’s called, right? Well, I surely have had a steel wall in front of my brain for a while, lol. I have been as busy as busy gets this past 2weeks; as tired as tired gets; and on my not-so-busy and not so tired days, I very happily confess that I chose to stay as lazy as lazy gets. Yup! Me needed da break, and me sure took it! When God wants to speak however, He gives you the grace and ability to carry through which is why despite having had to stay out all day at two different meetings and events, head off from there to the shops, and straight into the kitchen for a marathon round of cooking this evening; I find myself filled with the zeal and energy to put write this post. Yes sis, I surely do have a message for you from the Lord.

God wants to know sis, are you still holding true to your hearts cry for 2012?

On the 22nd of January this year, the Lord ministered to me with Colossians 1 v 9-10. I noted this Scripture in my journal and beside this I penned the words ‘my hearts cry for 2012’. As the Lord took me back this evening to the notes that I made in my journal that day, I couldn’t help but wonder at first, why God would be reminding me of my hearts cry for the year 2012 when we are almost at the middle of the year. As I pondered this, the refrain from Don’s song came back strongly to me: ‘’Lord I want my life to reflect Who You are’’

Bam! It hit me then! God is asking simply that I stop....that you stop, and take stock of where we are in Him and how far we have really grown in the knowledge of His will, in spiritual wisdom, and in understanding and discernment of spiritual things (Colossians 1 v 9). God is asking if we are still focused on zero-living. God is reminding you and I that He has great plans concerning our lives in the year 2012, but that we need to stop and check whether the busyness of life (I mean, can you believe it’s June already?) has once again gotten in the way of our focus on Him. God is saying to us that we need to redirect our energies towards seeking Him because it is only in the place of His presence, and in obedience to His will that He can make manifest the great things that He has purposed for us. God is reminding us that relying on our strengths, on our plans, on the counsels of men, etc.. is simply manifesting a fundamental mistrust of Him. He is asking that we come back to that place of full trust and dependence on Him who is our all. God is asking if in the time that has past this 2012, we can confidently say that we have lived lives that reflect who He is? He is asking us to reflect on this because we should not move as we are into the rest of the year.  

It ministers to my spirit that God for sure does not want us to find ourselves in November asking ourselves ‘So what exactly did I achieve this year?’ You and I know how traumatic it is to realise that time has passed and you can’t begin to account for what you have achieved or how you have grown or helped others grow in that time.
Over the past few weeks I acknowledge that I have been too busy or too tired (as a result of being too busy .....Catch 22) to pray as much; to praise as much; to seek God as much; to read my Bible as much, as I ordinarily would and should. But as I once again stepped into my meeting room with God yesterday morning, He reminded me how He waits patiently and lovingly for us to come full circle right back to Him so that we can flourish in the place of His presence.

Today sis, please take a few minutes to reflect on what your hearts cry for 2012 has been. It may be the same as mine, or it may be different. It really does not matter as long as God is in your equation. I suspect that like me however, that you may not be able to say as resounding a ‘Yes’ to God’s question of how well you have lived your life in reflection of Him from January to date. Like me, it could be that your ‘Yes’ would have been louder in January and February that it is now. And no, I am not trying to insinuate some growing unrighteousness or sin in your life. Far from it! However, truth is that a dim torch still emits light in darkness, but how feeble that light is when compared to the Light of the World. God is asking at this time that we come fully back to the source and power up, so that we may shine brightly and in clear reflection of Who He is. He is asking us to stay fully connected so that He can use us for His glory and so that daily we shall indeed reflect His power, His might, His majesty and His glory. This is the cry of my heart! I pray it shall also be yours sis.

Be blessed......for you surely are!

I kinda like me!

Scratch that! I don’t just kinda like me. I love me!

I absolutely love me! I love my strengths, I love my weaknesses and insecurities; I love my full hips and my small lips; I love my mind and my unique way of thinking; I love that I am usually different in a crowd; I love my husband; I love my many children; I  love my many skills; I love the many things that I cannot do and which I am (now) at peace with; I love my few but deeply treasured friends; I love my mostly unknown enemies (yes, even they serve a purpose); I love my occasional moods and idiosyncrasies; I love my insane love for chocolates and cheesecake (not to mention hot peppered jollof rice and stewed beef, slurp!); I love my highs and I love my lows; I love my love for learning; I love my love for helping others grow; I love my one-too-many gray hairs; I love my old-school approach to just about everything; I love my love for silence; I love my love for love and laughter.

Indeed, if you haven’t gotten my drift yet, let me summarize again and say this: ‘Girrrllll, I simply truly just love me! I am crazy about authentic, super yet inadequate, introverted yet extroverted, quiet yet crazy, shy yet bold, simple yet strong, blah blah blah me! I love me....full stop!  Wait for it.......... Whew!!!!!  Ah, but it feels great to exhale!

Hmmm, I can already see you trying to figure out what’s up with me today right? I feel you sis. Here’s the thing. I had a couple of experiences and interactions after my last post that left me in a place of deep introspection. What kept coming back to me was how for most people, their biggest challenges actually stem from a very deep-rooted insecurity about themselves. I’m no psychologist, but methinks too many of us don’t know ourselves, don’t understand ourselves, and worse still, don’t like ourselves enough. From that standpoint therefore, it’s so easy to create the cracks in our armour that allow the enemy easy access into our minds and psyche. I have come to realise that so many of us (men and women alike) are hiding our quiet insecurities under the guise of fine clothing, shoes, bags, jewellery, power suits, hair and nails. We mask our real selves even more with our gadgets (bb’s ipads, iphones, etc). Then there are also those of us who mask our real selves further still behind the who-we-know’s and who-we-hang-with’s; trying so hard to redefine ourselves in the shadow of others who in our estimation are better than we are in some way or the other. Sadly, in many ways we truly just don’t realise that all we are doing is hiding from facing up to who we really are, and you can only be so willing to hide from you if you just don’t like the ‘you’ that you really are in your quiet space.

Sis, go stand naked (yes, stark!) in front of a full length mirror. Go do this the very first chance you have today. Take a good look at you sis. Examine every inch and every bulge, every smooth skin and every wrinkle, every stretch-mark and every crinkle. From the top of your head to the tip of your toes, look pointedly at every part of you, girl. When you are done, say to out loud to yourself ‘Fearfully and Wonderfully made!’ Repeat this to your reflection as many times as it may take you to begin to believe it. Then put some clothes on, but no make-up pls (let’s work on the authentic you). Pull out a jotter and a pen and plant yourself on a seat in from of the same mirror. Look at yourself again sis. Look straight and deeply into your own eyes and ask yourself ‘Who am I?’ Be truthful to you about your strengths and your shortcomings. As my friend DNW would say ‘brag on yourself’. Yes sis, write down everything you know to be great about yourself. Then more honestly, write down everything you know to be not-so-great about you. Be real with you sis (you can burn your list later, lol). When you are done with this, then say to yourself again, ‘I’m not perfect, but I’m an awesome work in progress!’



From my perspective, an awesome WIP is all any of us really ever needs to be. The Bible makes clear that there is no one perfect, not one - save for our God who is Himself perfection. Only God has it all so cut yourself some slack sis. God does not worry about His looks - He doesn’t need to. He is an awesome wonder, radiant and majestic, too beautiful to behold; He does not worry if He has the right smarts - He is wisdom and understanding all by Himself. God does not worry about His character - He is a loving, charming, loyal, a friend that sticks closer than a brother, faithful, compassionate, trustworthy. He does not worry about anyone else having talents and abilities that He does not have. No, He is the source of all power, all gifts and talents. He is not in competition with anyone; He is God all by Himself! God sees it all, has it all, knows it all, and has already planned it all.



If we truly deeply believe this, then we must truly believe that He made us in His image and likeness; that He fashioned us for His purpose and glory; that He it is who put our every gifts and talents (be it one or many) in us. We must know and know with deep conviction that God is incapable of making mistakes. He designed us the way we are. He didn’t need us to be just like Miss A or Mrs B. Oh no, no, no! My God, all perfect and all knowing, designed me to be simply uniquely me, and you to be uniquely You! He designed each and every one of us for His glory, to do His will and for His pleasure. Regardless of anything about you that you may find fault with, if you are a born-again believing child of the Most High God, there is one truth that should never escape you - God loves you just the way you are. Whatever your imperfections (as you see/perceive them to be), you just have to come to that place where you love who you are just as you are, because your Father in heaven loves you just the way you are. I dare say that He loves you even more through every mistake and every trial that tries to break your spirit. Just ask any earthly parent if you aren’t one yet. We love our children regardless!

I haven’t always been in this place. I have walked my walks of shame, of uncertainties and insecurities, of inferiority complexes and of outright self-condemnation. But one day, I allowed the truth of God’s Word to really wash over me and this is what I ask you to open your heart to today.  Loving me is for me about no one else and nothing else, but my conviction that I am the apple of God’s eye. I am the clay in the Potter’s hand. He does not throw me away due to my imperfections. No, He just smiles lovingly and continues to mould me. He is confident because He sees me as I ‘am’ when His work is finished. I choose to be confident because I know He is the master craftsman and so I can be sure my end will be perfect. I encourage you to take this walk with me today sis. Fall in love with you and love you to the fullest!



So go strut your stuff in front of everyone girl. No matter what they think or what they say about you, you are who???....... YOU! Again, you are fearfully and wonderfully made. Don’t you ever forget that!

(Ps: the paragraph above was added by my 12yr old daughter with love to you. Thanks Michy)



Be blessed sis..... because you truly are!